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Story Tellers
I saw a marvelous film today. Atom Egoyan’s Adoration. I got a call at 9 AM from a friend saying she had won tickets from the CBC and did I want to go. I, only moments before, had been silently lamenting the fact that I had failed to see even one film at this year’s International Film Festival, so you can imagine how quickly I reoriented my day. What a movie! And what a study on the power of storytelling. Without giving away the movie, it follows the impact of one young man’s story (told as if it were the truth) on the lives of both himself and others’ and then meditates upon the difficulties one has in getting away from a well told story once it has taken on a life of its own.
I was particularly moved by this film because story-telling has been a constant theme in my work lately. Appreciative Inquiry and all its delicate permutations is concerned with storytelling. Organizational change is approached from the perspective that change is better set in motion by understanding pinnacle strengths not entrenched weaknesses and thus AI processes frequently begin with an inquiry or investigation into what constitutes the positive core of the organization, in other words its “good story”. Combining my love of AI with the latest research in neuroplasticity is, quite honestly, blowing my mind! (See prior post for more on that!)
We are all story-tellers. What I am increasingly interested in is the way in which the stories we tell help or hinder the changes we seek to make in our lives. Coaching is about change. A client comes to a coach wanting something to be different. They may be seeking improved […]
No Stick For Me
Dan and Chip Heath are the brothers that brought you the New York Times bestseller Made To Stick. They have also landed themselves a nice monthly column in Fast Company. In April they featured a story called “Your Boss is a Monkey-Managing up using the tricks of exotic-animal training”. The gist of the article is that our reactions to inappropriate behaviors are either reinforcing or neutralizing. If we don’t like what others are doing we are advised to IGNORE IT. Not the person per se, but the behavior. Eventually this will lead the person to adopt new, more appropriate strategies for getting what they want in the circus ring of life. There is only one problem with this theory, it is unrealistic and difficult to practice. Perhaps with a two year old we can do it, but a tyrannical boss or a long-winded but respected colleague will be incensed or bewildered by your odd “Vulcan” demeanor. Instead try this:
Focus on what you want more of and when you see it blow on it. The best way to change a person (or a culture) is to recognize the inherent positive intent in others. That positive intent (however poorly conveyed ) is alive and well in some manner – it is up to you to blow on the delicate embers of more appropriate behavior. Acknowledge the behaviour you want more of whenever you see it, even it it is just a pale glimmer of what you long to see. In organizations we are quick to point out what bothers us about others, what we don’t like and don’t want. But if we adopt the principles of appreciative inquiry and appreciative leadership we start […]
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