Proud of Myself

There’s a rock

Lodged in a hole.

At the base of a big,

Green,

Tree.

I have run past it hundreds of times,

Maybe more.

I wonder

What’s behind it?

Today I stop. Stoop. Grab hold of it.

Mossy. Slippery. Wet.

I tug, heaving, careful of my

Back against the strain

It comes free.

Now, at last,

I can see

Down the hole.

And I’m proud of myself for having stopped,

When I could have kept on running.

Seeking Sky

photo

I am walking one of my favourite trails in Vancouver. It weaves along the bluffs of Spanish Banks, before either dipping down to the sea of veering south toward the university campus. On this particular day, in early September, I am strolling. When I walk, especially in nature, ideas come to me that would not ordinarily arrive, and I am always delighted when a certain breeze or vista offers up the gift of a metaphor and carries me away. Today it is a tree, an odd slender cedar with a tenacious urge to see the sun. The tree has bent itself over, growing parallel to the ground, before pushing itself upright again, some 8 feet later. The s-curve makes something of bench for those inclined to seize the moment and take a seat. Despite having walked by this particular tree many times, today it encourages me to think about how we are all seeking the light; literally, as a necessary life force, but also figuratively, in our lives, with our families, and in our organizations. I began to wonder about the ways I have contorted my own life, working my way around things, over things, and through things in search of my sky. I think all of us are searching for the sun light of our true nature and that search takes us and shapes us in all sorts of ways- good and bad.  I carried on along the trail, reflecting on the work I do as a coach, and how so much of it is about helping people determine and head for their own light. And I was comforted by the idea that, like the tree, even our most twisted turns, can be beautiful.

What is the light you seek?

What warms your heart and brightens your world?

What new and unexpected shapes are you willing to take on?

Who or what stands in your way?

 

Natural Born Leaders

She might be an older friend, or a big sister and shes barking out orders with unquestionable authority to Victoria, a smaller girl clutching the flimsy handle of a plastic bucket. “Hurry! Run!” she IMG_4838yells, pointing toward the low lying sea, about 100 yards off, “Hurry, or they’ll die! And come back as fast as you can!” Victoria turns abruptly, pivoting her bare heel in the damp sand, and sets off, with earnest effort toward the shoreline. She’s saving crabs, little ones. They have become trapped in a swiftly shrinking tide puddle. The older girl hangs back, suddenly alone with herself, under the hot sun with all these little crabs and a huge job ahead of her.

The pool has been steadily warming as it evaporates in the mid day sun and she’s worried the water will either get too hot or disappear altogether. Crab Bisque, I think to myself, as I watch her. “Hurry up!” she screams again, remembering time is running out and there’s work to be done. “Come on! Run!” she yells but her voice is swept from her mouth and carried away on the rippling airwaves. Victoria can’t hear her.

Far away now, I can see her small bent-over form, she’s tipping the bucket and I sense the relief welling up inside her. Because she’s done it, she’s saved them. Later, as I’m walking back through the tall grass, jumping drift wood and wondering where the actual path is that will take me past the BBQ pit and on up to the parking lot, I realize these girls have got what it takes to make a difference in the world: vision, passion, and something worth fighting for. It’s been a good day for all of us.

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Role Playing: A Practice That Makes Perfect…Sense!

The Creative Coach Spring 2013_issue 2

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The Creative Coach Spring 2013_issue 2

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Role Playing: A Practice That Makes Perfect…Sense!

The Creative Coach Spring 2013_issue 2

Click to download PDF of this Article

The Creative Coach Spring 2013_issue 2

Click to download PDF of this Article

 

When it Comes to Coaching, Are You As Creative As You Can Be?

When It Comes to Coaching Are You Creative_Summer_2013

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Probortunity

A probortunity is simultaneously the kernel of possibility and the problem. A probortunity is a different kind of conundrum, requiring the mental acts of investigating and solving, as well as a willingness and urge to germinate and grow something entirely new and inspiring.
We have all had experiences where we talk about the silver lining. You’ve probably heard people say things like, “well if it hadn’t been for that car accident I never would have met my future husband” and you probably know people who praise the challenges they’ve faced as cataclysmic  events when their lives took on new meaning,  purpose and direction. Mostly these comments are after-the-fact sentiments that help us to make sense of why bad things have happened to us in the first place.
A probortunity however, is born from a proactive sensibility rather than a reactive one. I believe there is tremendous power in this small, cumbersome  and illegitimate word. These days, with the onslaught of problems a fresh and hopeful spark may help each of us grow a sweeter, juicier fruit right from the start.
For more on the inventors of this fine if somewhat illegitimate word click here

Cause, Effect and Unexpected Debris

When it comes to cause and effect we tend to be overly concerned with the effect others are having on us and rarely consider how we ourselves are influencing or causing results.  A poorly prepared meal in a restaurant,  harsh words from a loved one, road construction and unnecessary delays,  missed deadlines, errors, these are personalized to the point of insanity while imagining that our own behaviours have a light and/or temporary influence on other people or processes “I said i was sorry, can’t you just get over it?”.

The truth is we  have no idea how the relationships  we cultivate or the emotions we generate today will influence  tomorrow. Or ten years from tomorrow.  In a related manner, the systems thinking principle behind this truth has recently  come to light here in British Columbia with the arrival of tons of debris from the Japanese Tsunami.  On a personal level we can think about this by imagining ourselves as both a spider and a web. As a spider we are moved by the smallest of breezes, the social and emotional climate, the comings and goings of others—the effects of which manifest in numerous ways. As a web, we are a  gossamer thread  touching everyone from the girl at the grocery store checkout counter, to our colleagues and loved ones to a switchboard operator thousands of miles away. And each touch point ripples outward in its own unexpected ways, touching off further effects or causes, some of which are obviously stronger than others.

Emotional contagion offers a great example of this ripple. At work or at home, the negative,  sad, or joyful mood of others can rub off on us (or vice versa). Then later in the day, we “carry” that mood forward into our relationships at home, even continuing on with pertinent stories of misery or glee depending on the contamination-  Indeed, this web stretches over vast distances as well. I once wrote a song, only to learn many years later that it had been taught to a group of people somewhere in the Gaza Strip!  Cause and effect- the ripple,  the web- can even, in true quantum fashion, fold back upon itself- returning to the source (us) in the form of what for many can only be thought of as Karma. “he really had it coming to him!” might be the words we utter when the great serpent comes around to bite its own tail. Or, in a more self pitying plea: “why does this always happen to me?”

So what does this all mean? You decide.

 

LEADERSHIP IS LIKE A SLOWLY SIMMERED SOUP

Leadership is like soup– if you want it to taste good, nourish people, comfort and inspire then you have to consider all of the ingredients that go into making a great leader and encourage the conditions that best enable one to simmer  to their fullest potential. So many leadership books and development programs talk only of skills-or competencies- and suggest that if one adopts, models or mimics the skills they will master the art of leadership.

This thinking is akin to believing that if you follow a recipe you will become a master chef and that simply isn’t true. Great chefs are dedicated to the cause of making great food. They make a point of considering every input- every ingredient that goes in, as well as their own creative influence upon the ingredients- the stirring, the dialing up or down of heat, cookware, altitude, seasonal availability, etc. So if leadership is a grand soup then what should go into the pot?

LEARNING- What a person has learned in the past and continues to learn for the future informs their world view and priorities. Ensure what you are learning is expansive enough to accommodate your highest aspirations. To remain creative make sure to include the pursuit of knowledge that is seemingly unrelated and enjoy the synergy that comes through diversity.

ENERGY-When a person eats well they have the stamina to meet demands. If you are what you eat, then what would your eating habits be saying about you as a person and leader- healthy food choices reveal an important aspect  of ones character and commitment to the planet. Choose organic, limit processed food and eliminate excessive sugar, salt and sodas.

ATTITUDE- Thoughts about the world, other people, and ourselves conspire to produce character. Meditate on these words by the Dalai Lama.

Take care of your Thoughts because they become Words.

Take care of your Words because they will become Actions.

Take care of your Actions because they will become Habits.

Take care of your Habits because they will form your Character.

Take care of your Character because it will form your Destiny,

and your Destiny will be your Life…

DREAMS- A leaders vision for the future is essential to her/his work and impact on others. What are your ideas, hopes, fears, beliefs, and aspirations and how are they informing your dreams for the future?

EXPERIENCE- What life experiences are informing your character, skills, and beliefs as a leader. Are past experiences getting in the way of future aspirations? Are new and upcoming experiences feeding your soul and mind in compelling and inspiring ways?

RELATIONSHIPS- Who do you love? Who do you hang out with? How do you nurture family and friends? As you are in your personal life, so you are in your professional life. Review the pleasure and inspiration that comes from your relationships with others. If there are improvements to be made- make them and let go of relationships if they are knowingly toxic. Heck you wouldn’t put poison in your soup would you?

SYSTEMS VIEW- What are you doing to expand your world view? As we seek to understand life beyond our front gate, beyond our borders, and beyond the familiar, we gain greater awareness of the vastness of the human condition and are better able to appreciate the diversity of people- There are many ways to make soup.

HEALTH- Should leadership cost us our health? Do you want to follow someone who cant seem to take care of themselves in a mindful way? Ensure you attend to the freshness of your own leadership ingredients by making healthy choices, getting sufficient rest, exercising, designing healthy working environments, and dealing with health problems promptly, and attending to your mental and physical health on an ongoing basis.

IDEOLOGY-How does ideology influence your presence as a leader? Are your thoughts and beliefs well founded and mindfully managed to limit harm or judgment of others?

PRESS (Media- What are you reading and consuming in the way of media- what TV shows are you watching, what newscasts do you favour, what propaganda are you succumbing to? What magazines do you read? How do you seek a wider perspective?